Day 32 – The “Should” part of my brain can go take a chill pill

Good morning and happy Saturday!

It was nice to be able to walk on my treadmill in the sunshine today. I should have been up at O’Dark-Thirty to get my walk in, and my day going, way before sun up. Here it is 9:30 and I am just now getting to the blog.

The “Should”part of my brain is berating my laziness, and murmuring angry whispers to me about how my morning has been wasted. Look at how much could have been accomplished, if I’d have only gotten out of bed at 7 when my alarm went off! Now I am behind, and will have to run to try to catch up with everything that needs to be done.

The “I Am Done With The Running And The Stress” part of my brain says to chill and enjoy the moment. Bask in the sunshine and sip coffee in the quiet of the morning. There’s no harm in being flexible and making sure you get a little rest, for your brain and your body.

These two areas of my brain have been at war with each other for a while now. I used to just go with the insistence of the “Should” part of my brain, and then I got divorced. At that point “Should” went out the window for “Have To”. I had to work two jobs to get by. I had to constantly run here and there for the kids, and whatever else needed doing.

I was constantly in survival mode for the first two years after my divorce, and it burnt off a lot of what “Should” was trying to convince me of: that I wasn’t good enough, and that I need to work harder, better, faster, stronger.  That’s not good enough, do it better. Your time management is terrible, get up earlier so you can cram more into every day….etc., recycle, rinse, repeat.

These days, I try to ask myself, what needs to be done now, and how do I balance that with what I want?

Today was supposed to be about a morning of housework, and then a leisurely afternoon strolling through the Home and Garden Show at The State Fair Center. But, as it turns out I will be spending the day with my Mom. The lady who gave my parents their dog (because she didn’t have the time or energy to keep up with the dog anymore) called Mom some time ago and said she wanted to stop by and visit on this date. I think somewhere in the back of Mom’s mind there was a little worry that this lady would try to take the dog back, and Dad was going to be out for the day. Safety in numbers means a lot.

Long story short, the lady never showed up, and I got to spend the day with my Mom. Everyone wins! The Home and Garden Show comes every year, and  I can see it next March. So, the housework that I should have done today will be put off for tomorrow. Or, maybe I’ll do it across evenings next week. The “Should” part of my brain can just go take a chill pill. As long as the bills are paid, and I have enough clothes to wear to work, that’s good enough.

Here’s hoping you have enough time in your life to be flexible to help out the important people in your life, and to take time for things that feed your soul. Tell that “Should” part of your brain to go take a long walk off a short pier. Blessings all!


Day 31 – Making do in the moment

Today I walked into the living room to take a walk on the treadmill, and (Poof!) the light died.  Time to go light bulb shopping.

Great. Now what?!

Well, sometimes you just have to suck it up and make do. I turned on my phone so I could see, found the treadmill and turned it on. It was weird walking in the dark this morning, but it got the job done.

Making do seems to be a theme around here, but that’s ok. It’s better to make do, than to just lay down and take it when life throws you a curve ball.

As I sit here writing the sun is starting to rise, and it’s only 7:10am. It’s rising earlier and earlier this days, and it makes me so excited for Summer. I don’t thrive much in the dark. Sometimes I need the dark just to help get the day off of me if it’s been busy and harried. I need the light more, though. These long months of Winter make me feel like a cave dweller, and in the Spring when the light comes back it’s the best thing.

Soon it will be time to cleanup  the yard and get it ready for whatever plans I’ve decided on for planting this year. I have a whole bunch, but can’t do them all. I guess I just need to pick a couple and go with it. Oh, the indecision!

Here’s hoping you have all the light you need, and have a way to make do in the moment if it goes out. Blessings all!

Day 30 – Victory gardens in the 21st Century

I’ve been giving it a lot of thought over the years, and have come to the conclusion that the average American has no survival skills.

What would happen if the electricity were to go out? That’s something I have more than a little stress about, living on the High Planes where the temperatures swing from less than -30 to 100+ throughout the year. There’s not much I can do about that at the moment, but I can grow things.

As a culture, we don’t know how to grow, or hunt for, our own food any more. And if we did, may not know how to preserve it.  I saw a meme on-line several times that declares something along the lines of people survived when things got back in the old days, because Grandma knew how to garden and her supply chain was local.

I have worked at both the Big Red and Big Blue box stores here in town, and I can tell you that their freezers and stock shelves in the back only hold so much. If the supply trucks aren’t able to get through, that food will only last about three days. I would imagine it’s the same for the grocery stores too.

When I got divorced, the first thing I did was make a list of all of the necessities, dry goods, etc. I thought the boys and I would use for a year. I filled three pages of college ruled paper, front and back. It was one of the things I did that made me feel like I had hard ground to stand on. Making a plan is a first step to making a person feel like they have some control of their environment a bad situation. Over time, I stocked a pretty good pantry, and it was a good thing.

Fast forward several years later, and my pantry is full of all kinds of crap that I don’t use. As things have gotten better, and Younger Son is gone with the Navy, we don’t have as much need for a well stocked pantry. Or do we?

I have a suspicion that things are going to get really rough coming up. Things in our country aren’t stable. Things where I live aren’t stable, and jobs are an issue. I think mine should be ok, but I have been surprised before.

Anyway, I’ll bet talking some more about my gardening plans, and how I plan on clearing out my pantry and bringing it back to life.

Here’s hoping that all is well and stable where you are, and that you have a plan just in case things go south. Blessings all!



Day 29 – A bunny moment of Zen

I have an old friend from high school who made friends with a cotton tail rabbit living in his neighborhood. Lately he has been posting videos of Carrots the Rabbit getting hand fed his favorite snack, carrots.

For some reason, I have just enjoyed the heck out of watching these little videos of my friend chatting to Carrots the Rabbit while he eats out of my friend’s hand. There’s something so calming about it, and it gives me something I can only describe as a little bit of peace after a long crappy day.

Sometimes, simple things are just the ticket. Life is so complicated. There are so many things coming at a person every day that it can be overwhelming, and you may not even realize it until you have the opportunity to just sit still and be at peace for a moment.

Here’s hoping you have something simple and awesome in your day that gives you a small moment of peace. Blessings all!


Day 28 – Strange dreams and portends

I don’t often remember my dreams, but last night was quite a show.

I’d had difficulty getting back to sleep after waking up, but once I did get back to sleep…wow! I was locked into a series of strange dreams featuring people I know, and people I don’t, all doing weird stuff. My street changed, and the sky above it had some unbelievable stuff floating in it, all of it behaving contrary to what we know about physics.

The worst part of this dream was having broken my glasses, and then carrying them through the strangeness of it all, trying to tell people that my glasses were broken, and they wouldn’t listen.

From time to time, in my youth, I had dreams that came true. Sometimes it was just the most mundane, normal stuff like a visit to the mall to get some shoes. Other times, my dreams would tell me about what my friends were up to. Not much of it would be right, but there would always be some kernel of truth to pull out of the bizarre narrative of my dreams that would indicate something to me which I would have had to be at the actual scene to know about.

I haven’t had one of those sorts of dreams for many years, but this dream had that feeling to it. While grasping to hold onto the words and images I wonder what it is that will stand out as something truthful.


Word on the etherial street says pay attention to everything. Or, perhaps it was the junk food I ate last night? Lol… maybe. Time will tell.

Here’s wishing you all many pleasant dreams, without so many strange things to ponder. Blessings all!

Day 27 -Spring Fever, it’s really a thing

Having had my walk and fixed up my favorite, non-weird, chocolate blueberry smoothie, I sit here and contemplate what I want to write. My thoughts keep turning to the seeds and the dirt that I bought yesterday. My favorite thing to do right now would be to plant those seeds, and spend some time in the sunshine fussing over them. That’s something I will be doing tonight. I have the pots, the dirt, and the seeds. I just need the time to plant them.

Yeah, I’ve got Spring Fever pretty badly. I’m really tired of all of the darkness and cold. I would really love to sit in the sunshine and soak up some heat and light.

Yesterday, I shut off my furnace and opened several windows. It’s so nice to get the stale winter air out, and I don’t care if it was only 8 degrees yesterday. At work, I am fortunate to have a working window. It faces North, so I don’t get any sunshine, but I do get fresh air if I need it.

Funny thing about my window at work – the pigeons like it too. One day I came back from lunch to discover that Bob the Pigeon had ducked into my slightly open window while I was gone. I was able to get him out again but, lesson learned, I always make sure the window is only open a crack now.

Here’s hoping you have lots of sunshine and fresh air where ever you are, and that your pigeons are less curious than Bob. Blessings all!

Day 26 – The Binding and the Backlash

Right off the bat today, let me provide the disclaimer that mine is a religion of one; specifically, I don’t adhere to any group or other individual’s idea of how they think religion or spirituality ought to work. My beliefs are my own and, quite frankly, are an amalgamation of things that I have picked up along the way. I tend to be more eclectic pagan than anything else, but you also can’t take all of the Lutheran out of the girl, even if you take the girl out of the Lutheran church. While I am mostly a very conservative person, I am very liberal when it comes to social and religious topics. As long as you aren’t harming anyone, I don’t have a problem with what you are doing…mostly because it’s just none of my business. I guess you could say I am a libertarian white-lighter, if a label is needed.

Having said all of that, I ran into a very interesting article on the internet today, which lead to a flurry of reading and listening this morning. A diverse group of witches/pagans has decided to participate in an ongoing spell to “…bind Trump and all those who abet him…”, and has invited the internet to join them by publishing the spell, the list of supplies, and the waning crescent moon dates when these rituals are to take place.

As part of my internet travels this morning, I had a look at Twitter. By searching #bindtrump and #magicalresistance, I ran into a whole lot of interesting things. Some of what you find out there are pictures of people’s altars, which I find interesting, and pictures of some things that were immediately funny to me like the picture of a cheeto with sewing needles sticking out of it. I giggled at that, thinking to my self that this lady really meant business, and moved on with my internet meanderings.

This picture stuck with me though, because it’s such a graphic representation of the lengths people are willing to go to when they feel cornered and afraid. Or, maybe they feel righteous indignation over having someone elected to be president who is (IMHO) clearly not a good fit to be a national leader.

I understand all of that and empathize with those feelings, but I have a few observations to share.

  1. Fear is your biggest enemy here. No president lasts for more than 8 years, and I realize this guy behaves like a wrecking ball wherever he goes, but please just take a minute to breathe and think before you act.
  2. When you bind someone, it’s no small thing. Binding should be a last resort in your spiritual tool kit. In my estimation it is something you do only in the direst of times when you have nothing left to lose, and maybe not even then. Not only are you binding yourself to the person(s) who is the focus of the ritual (and their energy can travel up that connection you have made if you aren’t careful), but it may be hard to get rid of down the line. Who wants energy like Trump’s or, even worse, Bannon’s, on or near you?  Ew….that’s just nasty. Every time I think about that I get a mental image of sharing my toothbrush with some random dog who has just  been chowing down on days-old road kill in July. Bleh!!. Again this is just my opinion, so take it for what it’s worth to you.
  3. For anyone out there thinking to take a prayerful approach and wants to pray for Trump & company to fail, please consider that prayer and spell work aren’t really much different. Praying for someone to fail is just black magic in my book, and isn’t nice. It could also come back on you, and who wants that kind of backlash?

Having said all of that, I have some suggestions to make:

  • For magical practioners out there who feel like they want to do something to make a difference, how about casting protective spells, or spells for peace, or spells for our government to be guided by wisdom and not greed?
  • How about we be circumspect about our spell work and prayers, and not be flashy and in your face about it, especially in a negative way. Even Jesus instructed his followers to go into their closet and pray. And, why not treat our neighbors as ourselves? Is Trump a complete ignoramus who appears to be doing harm to our country? I think so, but he is still a human being and to curse him is to curse ourselves.
  • I used to belong to a group that sent what we called spiritual love bombs to folks who were hurting, or in need of help. What if we prayed for love, peace, and healing, rather than praying for someone to fail? I think the world would be a lot better place.
  • For some interesting opinions, check out Dragonfeather369 and Bluesage on You Tube. They have some interesting wisdom to share on this topic.

Again, this is all just my two cents right off the cuff this morning. I would welcome all of you to chime in. Here’s hoping you all find much love and light in your life to share. If you don’t find much, give out as much as you can. It just amplifies, because what you put out into the world comes back to you, and that’s the truth no matter what religion you practice. Many blessings to you all!