Day 12 -20 Browser pages open, all searching different things at once

I read a couple of interesting articles today about Zen Buddhism and meditation. I have tried meditation, and I find it relaxing. It’s difficult for me to do without a guided meditation playing in the background, though. My brain is always going, always wondering about something. It’s like my mind has 20 browser pages open, all searching for different things at once.

I wish I were intellectual enough to be able to keep track of all of that and have the information be useful. Rather, the inside of my head is very much like the scene from Twister where cows are being tossed about between tornadoes.

There’s SO MUCH!

So much, I want to know. So much I want to see. So much I want to discuss. So much I want to learn how to do. I want to start planning my garden; I long for something new and green to care for in the middle of Winter. I want to pick up my guitar and learn how to play again…it’s been 25 years since I played regularly.

There’s so much I need to do. So much I need to keep account of. So much maintenance that needs to be done on my house. So many things at work I am behind on. So many directions to be pulled in at one time. So many people to take into consideration to make sure everyone is taken care of or happy.

Then there are the “should’s”….

I should be cleaning my main floor. I should be reorganizing my pantry, which has been let go for so long. I should finish going through boxes in the basement and complete the job of getting rid of all of the little pots of poison left over from my married life. I should go take a shower and get on with my day.

Where do I fit into all of that, and how much is manufactured worry and want, rather than what is absolutely necessary?

What do I NEED?

Maybe I should ask what do I need today?

Having had breakfast, coffee, and my morning walk, I have taken care of those needs. Here’s where my wants and needs intersect today: Taking a shower, taking my Mom shopping, and then going over to my Flirt’s house for supper and Super Bowl.

Do I need to watch the Super Bowl? No, but I want to spend time with my sweetie since Mother Nature screwed me out of going ice fishing with him yesterday. Yeah, I feel a little cranky about that.

Anyway, here’s hoping you have lovely day, where your wants and needs intersect nicely. Blessings all!



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